We could have enjoyed our time in London so much, in a healthy and fun way, without so much suffering. Attachment ruins everything, you convince yourself by lying to yourself over and over again that there is nothing better than that person. You abandon yourself, you let yourself be stepped on and you throw yourself to the ground until you can't take it anymore, you have to hit rock bottom to be able to be reborn like the phoenix from the ashes.
I would've preferred to realize all this a little earlier, without having to go through what I went through, however, I do not regret what I learned, what I realize now, what I am and what I have. The only thing I have to do in this life is to love myself, to love and respect myself. I am giving too much energy again and I needed to recharge myself.
I see your pictures, yes, those I took of you in black and white when you were in my room in London for the first few days, and I realize that I don't see you in the same way as before. In that blind and dangerous way. I am thankful that I learned what I learned with you, and that I will never again allow myself to feel this way. To go on with my life, that the suffering is my own decision, not life's.
August always brings me so much to think about, my Moon in Leo, like when I met you, on August 5th, 2018. I don't think I can ever forget that date. I recognized your soul as soon as I looked into your eyes, and that feeling in my body as soon as you turned to look at me. I had never felt something similar, I found you, my twin flame.
Time has passed, it's been 3 years since that day, I remember when I told you that I didn't want to live without you, that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you, and the way you made me cry, I became addicted to the pain you caused me, it was like a drug for me, and you enjoyed seeing me like that so much, it was toxic, the pure poison of attachment. I am thankful that we are no longer together, I am thankful for you, for me, and for what I have learned.
I loved you very much. I wish you the best in this life and the next should you return to the world. I hope I do not return the day I leave; I hope I can become conscious in this life and transcend.
I release you today.
Xx
Gre ❤
